“Free Your Inner Misfit.”
Sometimes on the road to self-growth, enlightenment and success … we have to walk alone. However, there’s a difference between walking alone toward something and feeling alone.
I wanna ask you. Have you ever felt that you were someone “outside looking in?”
For me, this has been an on-again, off-again sentiment throughout my life. Although it never stays for good, it does stays long enough to feel misplaced, which ultimately influences me to go inward and evaluate.
Lately, this feeling has been on again. And last week, I took a time out to reflect and journal. During this time, I ended up researching this idea of “outside looking in” to see if there’s anyone else out there feeling the same way.
And you guessed it … I’m NOT alone. Which means if you’ve ever felt this way, you are not either.
I’m not going to lie. This is one of the strangest feelings I’ve ever experienced. And it’s just recently that I have really started trying to understand it. It’s knowing that you’re doing well but still feeling out of place. It’s feeling that you belong yet you don’t – it’s knowing that your presence is there and people are surrounding you, yet you feel as though you’re a “misfit” and “outsider” just passing through…
No matter what you do to “get rid of it”, the feeling will stay for however long it pleases. Unfortunately, it’s not something you can just push out, you don’t know how to really get rid of it, and it’s not something you can just shake off.
I bet you’ve probably been told plenty of times that you’re “just fine,” to “just think positive” that “people love you” all while the person providing this advice just regurgitates a bunch of cliché life quotes that will magically make you feel better.
Don’t worry, I won’t do that to you.
Sure, it’s important to think positively overall in life, however, we must feel the uncomfortable emotions to learn, grow and evolve.
As mentioned before, the good news is that this feeling doesn’t stay forever. But when it does come from time to time … it’s just so bothersome. Makes you questions yourself and bring about self-doubt.
Therefore, I want to help provide you some insights to my recent research and self-reflection on this “on again” experience with this odd outsider feeling.
The Four Categories of Misfits
Misfits are usually individuals who have a sense of detachment from the world because of their emotional, spiritual and mental makeup. They generally have an increased awareness and sensitivity, usually have different priorities and a way of thinking, while pursuing goals that are different from the masses.
They go agains’t the grain in a good way. Therefore, don’t be despaired! There’s a bright side to being a misfit! And they are highlighted in the four categories below.
Many people associate with being an “old soul” are thought to have the habits of an older person or those individuals who would rather be in bed by 9 p.m. than go out and party. Although this is sometimes the case, actually being an old soul shows a level of maturity much higher than expected for their age and are classified as people who excel in intelligence and/or sensitivity. Old souls often feel like they don’t belong here, especially when growing up because being passionate about unpopular things may make others pick up on your differences. And this can be painful in your awkward childhood and teenage years, making you feel like a misfit who doesn’t have a place in this world.
Deep thinkers pause from the fast-moving, automated and technologically centered world to ponder what truly matters in life. They ask the big philosophical and spiritual questions like the meaning and purpose of life. Many deep thinkers are reserved, quiet and introverted. They prefer to slow down, take the time to reflect … and consider their actions, the world, and their place in it. Sadly, the society we live in is giving more and more importance to superficial, material and instant gratification. That’s why seeing people chasing transient goals and being interested in meaningless things can be so disappointing. And often times makes you wonder what you are doing here, among these people … basically feeling like you come from another world all together.
The trademark of an empath is feeling and absorbing other people’s emotions and/or physical symptoms because of their high sensitivities. They filter the world through their intuition and have a difficult time intellectualizing their feelings. Empaths are naturally giving, spiritually attuned, and good listeners. If empaths are around peace and love, their bodies assimilate these and flourish. However, on the flip side, any negativity – through direct or indirect experiences (think news or 3rd parties) can be so internalized that it often feels assaultive and exhausting, provoking bouts of depression and/or a sense detachment.
The Enlightened – or those on the path
There is so much varying opinion on what being spiritually enlightened or awakened really means. However, based on what I have learned so far along with my own personal experiences, for me it comes down to trying to attain as much balance as we can between our mind, body and soul. It’s using our third eye for guidance, leaning into God daily, and shining our own inner light. Keep in mind, there are varying degrees in enlightenment, however, it’s about a daily intention. Usually people who are enlightened share these characteristics: ability to live in the moment, have an integrated personality, sense of oneness with life, sense of oneness/connection with God, and omit a calm, loving and radiant energy. So as one becomes is working within on attaining these characteristics or practices … they can start becoming more alienated from those who are not.
To close out my thoughts, I’ll get vulnerable and share with you the poem I wrote last week. Here goes (gulp).
And in the meantime, I would love to hear if you’ve ever felt like you didn’t belong? If you’ve ever felt like the person outside looking in? And if you have, you can see you’re not alone and you have many beautiful gifts to help you carry out your life purpose!
REFLECTIONS OF THE GIRL OUTSIDE LOOKING IN
Sitting here, all I hear is indistinctive chatter.
With the occasional burst of laughter piercing through.
But all I hear is nothing new.
I hear my thoughts compete with the crowd.
I hear myself talking me out of the ugly cry.
Asking myself why oh why.
Is it me?
Do I repel?
Or deep inside am I not well?
So much to be thankful for.
Yet from time to time,
I wonder if I’m destined for more?
But what is more?
It’s not riches or fame,
But to know the reason I’m made!
The reason I’m alive!
Since being just a little girl,
My thoughts have always been,
The foreign girl “outside looking in.”